Okay, let's talk about finding love in a frozen land full of dragons and bandits. Seriously, how do you get married in Skyrim? It's not exactly the first thing that pops into your head when you're dodging frost trolls, right? But maybe you want a cozy home, a steady income boost, or just someone to cook you a meal after a long dungeon crawl. Whatever your reason, figuring out the marriage system is key. I remember my first playthrough, wandering around clueless for ages before stumbling on the amulet. It felt totally random! This guide aims to save you that hassle and cover *everything* you need, from finding the right partner to the weird little benefits (and occasional annoyances) of wedded bliss.
The Absolute Essentials: What You NEED Before Proposing
You can't just walk up to someone and pop the question. Well, you *can*, but they'll just stare at you blankly. Skyrim has rules, surprisingly mundane ones for a fantasy realm. Forget grand gestures initially; focus on these basics:
- The Amulet of Mara: This is non-negotiable. Think of it as your engagement ring. Without it equipped visibly around your neck, potential spouses won't even consider your advances. "How do you get married in Skyrim without the amulet?" You simply don't. Full stop.
- Finding the Amulet: You've got options. Buy it from Marlise in Riften's Bee and Barb (usually around 200 gold, price fluctuates slightly). Or, keep your eyes peeled while adventuring – they sometimes appear in chests, especially in places tied to Mara (like temples). I found one early on in a bandit camp near Whiterun, pure luck.
- Wearing it Right: Equip it in your apparel slot. Just having it in your inventory won't cut it. Head to your inventory (Items -> Apparel -> Amulet slot).
- A Willing Partner (Who Actually Likes You): Not everyone is romanceable. They need to be marked as a potential spouse. More importantly, they need to *like* you. This is where the "Friend" status comes in.
Becoming "Friends": How to Win Their Heart (or at least their favor)
This is the part that trips people up. How do you get married in Skyrim? Become their buddy first. Forget flowers and chocolates; Skyrim courtship is... practical. You need to complete a quest for them or help them out significantly. This earns you the "Friend" status.
How to Gain "Friend" Status | Examples | Important Notes |
---|---|---|
Complete Their Personal Quest: Most potential spouses have a specific task they need done before they warm up to you. | Help Camilla Valerius settle the dispute between Faendal and Sven (Riverwood). Help Ysolda get a Mammoth Tusk (Whiterun). Do Aela's totem quests (Companions). | This is the most common and reliable way. Talk to them extensively to trigger their quest. |
Complete a Quest Related to Them: Sometimes helping their family, guild, or town counts. | Become Thane of their hold (often involves helping citizens, including them). Complete major questlines affecting them (e.g., freeing the Stormcloaks if they support them). | Less consistent. Becoming Thane usually works for hold-specific NPCs. |
Hire Them as a Follower: Some followers become available for marriage after traveling with you for a while. | Lydia (Whiterun Housecarl), Jenassa (Drunken Huntsman, Whiterun), Marcurio (Bee and Barb, Riften). | Not all followers are marriageable. Traveling together builds affinity, but usually requires completing their personal trigger first. |
Once they're your friend, equip that Amulet of Mara. When you talk to them, a new dialogue option appears along the lines of *"That Amulet of Mara... are you looking for marriage?"* or *"I notice you're wearing an Amulet of Mara. Interested in me?"*. That's your green light! Select it, and if you've met the criteria, they'll happily agree. Choose the time for the ceremony – usually midday the next day works.
Finding yourself stuck? Ask "why can't I get married in Skyrim?" to this specific NPC? Double-check:
- Are they definitely a marriageable NPC? (See the list below)
- Did I successfully complete their specific friend-quest trigger? (Talk to them again, sometimes dialogue options change)
- Is the Amulet of Mara *equipped* right now?
- Have I accidentally attacked them or committed a crime in front of them?
Who Can I Marry? Your Skyrim Dating Pool, Ranked and Reviewed
Not every character in Skyrim is looking for love. The list is diverse, spanning holds, races, and professions. Here's a breakdown of popular choices, where to find them, and what perks (or quirks) they bring:
Spouse Candidate | Location | Race/Type | Key Perks & Notes | Friend Quest Needed |
---|---|---|---|---|
Aela the Huntress | Jorrvaskr, Whiterun (Companions) | Nord (Werewolf) | Strong warrior follower (great for combat!). Runs a shop. Can't cure her lycanthropy if you become a Companion after marriage. Bit intense. | Complete the Companions questline OR complete her specific totem quests during the line. |
Ysolda | Whiterun (Often near Breezehome/Drunken Huntsman) | Nord | Very common choice. Aspiring merchant. Runs a shop. Very accessible early game. Where many players first learn how do you get married in Skyrim. | Bring her a Mammoth Tusk (found on dead mammoths or in Jorrvaskr basement). |
Marcurio | Bee and Barb, Riften | Imperial | Powerful mage follower (expensive to hire initially - 500 gold). Runs a shop. Fantastic for ranged/magic support. A bit arrogant. | Hire him as a follower (500 gold). Travel with him for a short while. Discharge him. Talk to him while wearing amulet. |
Mjoll the Lioness | Riften (Usually in market or Bee and Barb) | Nord | Strong warrior follower (uses unique sword). Essential (can't die). Hates thieves. Runs a shop. Comes with Aerin (her fan), who might hang around your house... awkward. | Retrieve her family sword, Grimsever, from Mzinchaleft (NE of Dawnstar). Requires fighting Falmer. |
Balimund | Riften (The Scorched Hammer) | Redguard | Blacksmith. Runs a shop. Nice guy. Solid choice if you want a non-follower spouse focused on crafting/home. | Bring him 10 Fire Salts (bought from alchemy shops, found on Flame Atronachs, in dwemer ruins). |
Senna | Temple of Dibella, Markarth | Breton | Priestess. Runs a shop. Requires finishing "The Heart of Dibella" quest (involves rescuing a girl). | Complete "The Heart of Dibella" quest. |
Lydia | Dragonreach, Whiterun (after becoming Thane) | Nord | Your first housecarl. Free follower early on. Runs a shop. Reliable but her "I am sworn to carry your burdens..." line grates after the 100th time. | Become Thane of Whiterun (help 5 people in the hold, kill the dragon at Western Watchtower). She becomes your housecarl. Talk to her with amulet equipped. |
There are many more! Scouts-Many-Marshes (Argonian dockworker in Windhelm), Ghorbash the Iron Hand (Orc in Dushnikh Yal stronghold), Borgakh the Steel Heart (Orc in Mor Khazgur), Sylgja (minor in Shor's Stone, needs her mother's necklace returned), etc. Exploring different holds often reveals unique options. What happens if you try to marry Serana? Good question! Sadly, the beloved vampire companion added in the Dawnguard DLC is not marriageable in the base game without mods. Big disappointment for many players. "How do you get married in Skyrim Dawnguard?" usually boils down to mods if you want Serana specifically.
The Big Day: Attending Your Skyrim Wedding Ceremony
So you popped the question, they said yes, you picked a time. Now what? Head to the Temple of Mara in Riften. Just go inside. Don't be late, though the ceremony usually waits a reasonable time. Inside, you'll find:
- Maramal: The Redguard priest who performs the ceremony. He's also the guy who sells the Amulet of Mara in the Bee and Barb. He'll initiate the wedding scene.
- Your Betrothed: Standing near the altar.
- Random Guests: A few NPCs, sometimes including other potential spouses (which feels a bit weird!). Maybe even someone you've done a quest for.
The ceremony itself is short and sweet. Maramal says a few words, you exchange vows ("Do you take this man/woman...?"), and bang, you're married! Afterwards, you get a new dialogue option with your spouse: *"Let's move in together."* You need to choose where that marital home will be.
Setting Up House: Where Will You Live?
This is important! You have to pick one of your *owned* houses. They won't move into a house you don't own. Here are your vanilla housing options:
- Breezehome (Whiterun): 5000 gold + ~1500 gold for furnishing. Easiest to get early game.
- Honeyside (Riften): 8000 gold + furnishing. Has a nice back door to the Riften docks.
- Vlindrel Hall (Markarth): 8000 gold + furnishing. Dwarven stone aesthetic.
- Proudspire Manor (Solitude): 25000 gold + expensive furnishing. Biggest, most expensive city home.
- Hjerim (Windhelm): 12000 gold + furnishing. Requires completing the Blood on the Ice quest first (can be buggy!).
- Severin Manor (Raven Rock, Solstheim): Free! Complete "Served Cold" quest in Dragonborn DLC.
- Heartfire Homes (Lakeview, Windstad, Heljarchen): Build your own! Requires purchasing land (5000 gold per plot) and significant resources/materials. Most customizable option.
Once you tell your spouse where to move, they'll head there immediately. If you own multiple houses, you can later ask them to move to a different one. Just talk to them and select the option. They'll pack their bags and relocate.
Married Life: Benefits, Quirks, and What Your Spouse Actually Does
Congrats, Dragonborn! You're hitched. But what now? Beyond companionship (which is nice, I guess?), marriage in Skyrim offers tangible gameplay benefits:
- Home-Cooked Meal: Once per day, your spouse will offer you a home-cooked meal. This is usually a "Lover's Comfort" dish (like Apple Cabbage Stew or Venison Stew) that grants the Lover's Comfort passive effect: Regenerate Stamina 15% faster for 8 hours. Useful, especially early on. Later, it's more of a nice touch.
- Income from a Shop: This is the BIG one. Your spouse will open a small shop business from home. Every day, you can ask them: *"Any luck with your store?"* They'll give you a cut of the profits, usually 100 gold. It's free passive income! Nice little gold boost daily. Where does this money come from? Video game logic, best not to question it.
- Free Training (Sometimes): If your spouse has a specific skill they excel in (like Aela with Archery, or Marcurio with Destruction), they *might* offer you training in that skill once per level. But honestly? This seems inconsistent or buggy for many players. Don't rely on it.
- Storage: They can act as another follower (if they are a follower type) and carry your burdens... literally. They also live in your house, so you can use containers there freely.
But it's not all roses and sweetrolls. There are quirks and downsides:
- They Never Leave the House (Mostly): Unless they are inherently a follower (like Aela, Mjoll, Lydia), they tend to just stay in your house all day, running their imaginary shop. They won't wander the town.
- The Shop Dialogue: Get ready to hear *"Take a look."* or *"Good to see you."* constantly. Every. Single. Time. You walk past them. It gets old fast.
- Limited Interaction: Post-marriage dialogue is very basic. Ask how the store's doing, ask them to move, that's about it. No deep conversations or relationship development. It feels transactional after the wedding.
- Potential for Accidents: If they are a follower and you take them adventuring, they can die (unless marked essential, like Mjoll)! Protect your investment. Losing Lydia to a random Draugr Deathlord was a low point for me. Reloaded that save, no shame!
- Adoption: Want kids? After you're married, you can adopt up to two children from orphanages (Riften Honorhall) or homeless kids on the street if you have a child's bedroom in your house (requires specific house or Heartfire home with child's bedroom built). They add some life and dialogue to your home.
Fixing the "I Can't Get Married" Blues: Common Problems & Solutions
Skyrim being Skyrim, things don't always go smoothly. Here's how to troubleshoot common marriage headaches:
Problem | Likely Cause | Solution |
---|---|---|
No "Interested in me?" dialogue option. | Amulet not equipped OR not a friend yet. | Equip Amulet. Double-check you completed their specific friend quest trigger. Talk to them again. |
Ceremony doesn't start at Temple of Mara. | Spouse or Maramal is stuck/not there. Timing glitch. Quest conflict. | Wait 24-48 hours inside the Temple. Reload a save before the ceremony time. Use console commands if on PC (moveto player on spouse ID or Maramal). Check active quests interfering (e.g., Thieves Guild initiation near Maramal). |
Spouse won't move in / "Let's move in" option missing. | No owned house OR spouse is bugged. | Ensure you own at least one house. Try talking to them in a different location. Reload. Use console resetai on them if PC. |
Spouse stops giving daily gold/store dialogue. | Common bug. Dialogue tree gets stuck. | Annoying, but try waiting/sleeping several days. Travel far away and come back. Sometimes it fixes itself. Reloading an older save might be needed (ugh). |
Spouse died. | Took non-essential spouse adventuring. | Reload a save before they died. PC players can use resurrect console command on their body. Otherwise... find a new spouse? Sad times. Save often when traveling with non-essential spouses! |
Can't find Maramal to buy the amulet. | He moves between Bee and Barb and Temple of Mara. | Check both locations. Often preaching in the Temple during mornings/early afternoon, in the Bee and Barb later. Be patient. |
Beyond the Basics: Mods, DLCs, and Player Choice
While the vanilla system works, it's undeniably shallow. "How do you get married in Skyrim" becomes more interesting with mods or considering the DLCs:
- Dragonborn DLC: Adds the awesome free house, Severin Manor, in Raven Rock on Solstheim. A unique marital home location! Also adds potential spouse Morwen (Skaal Village) after helping the Skaal.
- Hearthfire DLC: This is the big one for family life. Build your own custom manor from scratch! Includes options for child's bedrooms, wings for kitchens, armories, greenhouses, libraries. Perfect for settling down with spouse and adopted kids. Feels much more like a real home than the vanilla city houses. Gathering all that quarried stone and lumber gets tedious, though.
- Marriage Mods (PC/Some Consoles): These fix bugs, add depth, and expand options:
- Marriage Mod SE / To Have And To Hold: Overhauls dialogue, fixes bugs, adds more interactions, allows marrying more NPCs (including Serana via add-ons). Highly recommended for immersion.
- Amorous Adventures (NSFW Warning): Adds extensive, often humorous/romantic questlines for many companions and NPCs, including marriage paths.
- Why Get Married? Personal Choice: Do you want the steady 100 gold/day? The Stamina regen? A place for your adopted kids? Or just the roleplay aspect of having a companion settled down? For the gold alone, it's worth it early/mid game. Later, it's mostly flavor. I usually do it for the shop income boost and the Heartfire home life. Others skip it entirely. No right or wrong answer!
Your Skyrim Marriage Questions Answered (FAQ)
Let's smash those lingering questions about how do you get married in Skyrim:
Q: Can I marry anyone in Skyrim?
A: No, only specific NPCs marked as potential spouses (see the table earlier!). Important characters like Jarls, Delphine, Serana (without mods), or faction leaders generally aren't options.
Q: Do I have to be a certain race or gender to marry someone?
A: Absolutely not! Skyrim marriage is completely open. Any race (Nord, Khajiit, Argonian, etc.) can marry any other race. Any gender combination is allowed (Male/Male, Female/Female, Male/Female).
Q: Can I get married multiple times?
A: No. Skyrim is strictly monogamous. You can only have one spouse at a time. To "remarry," your first spouse would need to... uh... meet an unfortunate end. Divorce isn't an option.
Q: Where is the Temple of Marriage in Skyrim?
A: It's the Temple of Mara, located in the city of Riften. Look for the building with the distinctive blue banner near the marketplace and the canals.
Q: Who is Maramal?
A: He's the Redguard priest found in the Temple of Mara or the Bee and Barb inn in Riften. He sells the Amulet of Mara and performs all wedding ceremonies. Essential for the process!
Q: Can my spouse die?
A: Yes, unless they are marked as essential (like Mjoll the Lioness). If you take your non-essential spouse adventuring as a follower, they can be killed in combat. Protect them or leave them safely at home!
Q: What's the best spouse in Skyrim?
A: There's no single "best." It depends:
- Best Follower/Fighter: Aela, Mjoll, Marcurio.
- Easiest to Get: Ysolda (Mammoth Tusk is easy), Lydia (become Thane of Whiterun).
- Best for Roleplay/Niche: Scouts-Many-Marshes (Argonian), Borgakh (Orc), Senna (Priestess).
- Best Shopkeeper: They all give 100 gold/day. Pick one you like!
Q: How do you get the wedding ring in Skyrim?
A: You don't get a literal ring. The Amulet of Mara serves as the engagement symbol. After marriage, you don't receive or wear a wedding ring. The game doesn't include that item.
Q: Can I marry Serana?
A: No, not in the vanilla game. Serana, the popular vampire companion from the Dawnguard DLC, is not a marriage option without using mods (like those mentioned earlier).
Q: How do I get married again if my spouse dies?
A: Once they are gone (and not just missing, but confirmed dead), you can equip your Amulet of Mara again and pursue another potential spouse. The dialogue options should reappear once you make a new friend.
Q: Can my spouse live in one of my houses while I live in another?
A: Sort of. Your spouse will live in the house you told them to move to. You can live wherever you want, including different houses. They won't follow you between houses unless you specifically ask them to move to your current location's house. You can only have one "active" home where your spouse resides.
Final Thoughts: Is Skyrim Marriage Worth It?
Figuring out how do you get married in Skyrim is honestly pretty simple once you know the steps: Amulet, Friend Status, Proposal, Temple. The biggest effort is often tracking down the right NPC and finishing their quest. The benefits – daily gold, a daily stamina-boosting meal, a place for kids, and a safe storage buddy – are genuinely useful, especially in the early and mid-game. That 100 gold a day adds up surprisingly fast when you're saving for Proudspire Manor!
Is it perfect? Not even close. The post-marriage interactions are bare-bones, the constant shopkeeper dialogue gets repetitive, and the system feels more like a minor economic perk than a deep relationship simulator. Can it be buggy? Oh yeah, welcome to Skyrim! But, there's a charming simplicity to it. Seeing your spouse in your custom-built Heartfire home, maybe kids running around, gives a sense of stability amidst the dragon chaos. Plus, free gold is free gold.
So, should you do it? If you want the practical perks, or enjoy the roleplay aspect of settling down in Tamriel, absolutely give it a go. Pick a partner whose vibe you like (or who fights well!). If you're purely a lone-wolf adventurer focused on the main questlines, you won't miss much by skipping it. But hey, knowing how do you get married in Skyrim is just another tool in the Dragonborn's belt. Happy spouse-hunting!
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